Hey everyone,
I'm writing this to you at 6:00 on a Sunday morning....what's wrong with this picture? It's jet lag I tell you!...haven't had a full night's sleep since I've been back last Saturday :( Be rest assured...I am amusing myself in the wee hours of the morning...one morning at about 3am I woke up and it was freezing- (a sharp contrast to waking up in Africa in the middle of the night because I was sweating) and realized my socks had come off. So I had to sit up (which wakes me up even more) and put them on. As I was putting the socks on I say "this sucks" and totally laugh at my my own pun in my head...get it? "sucks"..."socks"....what? it's just me??? Anyways, I tell you this as a disclaimer. I've been wanting to write you guys upon arriving from Africa a week ago so here it is...please forgive me as I write in a sleep deprived state :)
We were asked at our debriefing the Friday we left to describe this trip in three words. I chose Heartbreaking, Challenging, Amazing.
Heartbreaking to see children orphaned by AIDS or just by irresponsible parents. Heartbreaking to know many more are being orphaned daily. Heartbreaking to hear stories of rape, death, and abandon. I saw a 29yr old man who lost his brothers to AIDS and was literally on his deathbed when we saw him- a physical skeleton with skin, living in a tin shack on a mattress on the dirt floor. Heartbreaking to see so many without....just without....and I wonder "how do they live?" Really gives meaning to "Give us this day, our daily bread."
Challenging to be stretched everyday, not only physically (our days started at about 6/7am to about 10/11pm) but emotionally and spiritually. Challenging to love and serve without pretense and judgement...does that make sense? Challenging to have to give so much of ourselves to so many people in such a short amount of time.
Amazing to see the joy the children have in their hearts- being content and satisfied with so little- (I guess our version of little, right?). Amazing to see the love and generosity George and AnnMarie pour out on all the children at the Ark, to the community, and to us. Amazing to hear the people sing praises to God, when they welcome us to their school or home, we really felt like it was a sneak preview of Heaven. Amazing to be able to bless others with the donations we collected. Amazing to see over a hundred students make the committment to "Choose to Wait." Amazing to see God's beautiful creation- in the people, the wondrous sky (the pictures don't do it justice), the sparkling stars and shooting stars we saw every night, the landscape, the giraffe, monkeys, and even the rhinos:).
As I've been home it's been hard to process all that has happened and all that I have learned. As you all know, we get so busy- esp. at this time of year. I know God brought me on that trip for a reason, or reasons, and I may never see it or understand. I am so blessed to have been chosen to go and to serve alongside such wonderful, extraordinary people. Will I go back? I hope so.
As for now, I pray that the Lord will continue to soften my heart and lead me...whether it be here or a country thousands of miles away. I don't want to get caught up in material things, in the busyness of Orange County life, and forget that there are many things I can do or pray for outside of myself, ouside of my own world.
Thank you for your support, encouragement, and prayers. I can honestly say I felt it the entire time I was there. You have no idea how much it means to me that you gave. Again, I went as an extension of you, so I know the Lord will bless you as well.
Here are 2 verses that I held on to as I was there:
Psalm 115:1
"Not to us, O Lord, not to us, but to Your name be the glory, because of Your love and faithfulness."
Ephesians 3:20-21
"Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power, that is at work within us. To Him be the glory in the church in Christ Jesus throughout all generations forever and ever, Amen!"
With much love and gratitude,
Lailanie